This is a question that every plastic surgery office has gotten multiple times a day. If you’re considering surgery, you’ve most likely wondered this to yourself as well.
The questions are almost like a broken record replaying in our heads: Will people think I’m self-absorbed if I have surgery? Am I selfish for wanting something for myself? Is it vain to have surgery because of my looks?
If you haven’t read Girl, Stop Apologizing: A Shame-Free Plan for Embracing and Achieving Your Goals by Rachel Hollis, it’s a MUST-READ. She writes about so many things that women go through- guilt, shame, fear, lack of confidence; all the things that can stop us from stepping into our full potential as women.
In the book, Rachel opens up about her “boob job” story. She breastfed her kids, and wanted to look the way she looked before she had babies. She struggled with the same fears that so many of us do when considering surgery- does that make me vain?
Let’s talk about that for a second. Confidence comes in all different shapes and sizes. Some of us feel most confident in jeans and a t-shirt (this girl right here), some of us feel our best in heels. Some women are in their element giving a speech to a huge crowd or pitching a new marketing campaign in a boardroom while others are most confident in their motherhood skills. There is no right or wrong way to feel confident, and it looks different for each woman. Confidence does not necessarily have to do with appearances, but for some of us the way that we look has a huge impact on our confidence. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
In her book, Rachel has a chapter devoted to confidence. In it, she says “Every woman I know- I cannot think of one single woman who doesn’t- feels more confident when she likes the way she looks.”
Witnessing women who shied away from taking photos or speaking to people they didn’t know before surgery transform into confident women who stand tall and proud is truly a blessing. Working with women who have breast surgery allows us to be part of that journey and for so many of them, once they feel happier with the way that they look, they become more confident in all aspects of their lives.
Many of the women we work with prefer a natural-appearing result- they just want to look the way they did before having kids or to be able to fill out the clothing they already own. Some want to return to their pre-implant appearance for an au-natural appearance. Everyone has different reasons and different body types.
But what if you do want to look different than you did before? What if your style is something a little more noticeable? Well, Rachel gives us some advice about that as well. She says, “Confidence comes from you liking the way you look, not from you looking a certain way.”
We can’t tell you that there will never be a person who judges your decision to have surgery. What we can tell you is that YOU are in charge of the way you want to look. The choice is yours, and the only person’s opinion that should influence your decision to have surgery is your own.
If you’re the person reading this who knows someone who has had or is having a plastic surgery, hold your judgement. You don’t know what that persons reason is. I’ve met women who’ve had surgery for reasons all over the grid – after a disfiguring accident, after battling cancer, after dealing with asymmetry, after breastfeeding children, or simply because they want to for their own personal reasons. Don’t be the person to judge, be the person to support. The world could certainly use a lot less judgement and more support.